Hardly working : A long(ish) rant

To start things off, just realised my blog has a 1000 views. I claim to the best of my knowledge that bribing and threatening friends could have lead to 990 of those views. So 10 people without any coercion have actually viewed the blog.By your tendency to inflict pain upon yourselves, I am assuming you are Liverpool fans!

Anyway getting to the topic at hand, I realize a lot of things have been pissing me off the last couple of months. I am not usually one to complain about anything ( ) so I have decided to vent my frustration in the form of this blog post. I must warn you at the outset that the post is going to contain mature language and bound to ramble off into atrocious nonsense ( wait that describes my entire blog!!). Never mind. Anyhow here goes:

THINGS THAT PISS ME OFF

Management language:

So after working (sic) in the corporate environment for a couple of months, I have realized the first thing an MBA equips you with is the ability to talk out of your arse and appear smart while doing so.

Sample a few gems thrown in a recent board meeting I attended ( or rather stumbled into without intending to, I was just guiding the guy from the canteen where to deliver the chai and biscuits and I got called in!)

” with increased sales our profits will increase .” — No shit, Sherlock

” we must always remember to dot the i’s and cross the t’s .”— Well writing is a basic skill we were taught in school. Its highly unlikely anyone is going to forget this in a hurry

” we will focus on the key issues regarding the project first and then worry about the rest. ” — You dont say?? If only I had a management degree to teach me such fantastic project solving strategies. I would have never got this one on my own!

” lets aim for a meteoric rate of growth.” : you mean shine brightly, then disintegrate spectacularly into millions of pieces? Sound business idea for the future like

“our sales model should play to our strengths.” : clevher i say!!

Anyway at the end of this discussion I was asked for my opinion on the proceedings and I  proceeded to give this little speech;

” We have to remember the industry is very competitive and the products and services offered by the key players are quite identical. What we need is to focus on our Unique Value Proposition to sell the product, establish a few priority differentiators which will give us a competitive edge in the market, use the brand name developed by the company over the years to be at the core of our marketing campaign and outsource product development to a few indigenous manufacturers and our contacts in the country’s research institutions to bring down product costs to corner a larger share of the market.”

Sounds like double dutch right? I was dozing off after being subjected to a couple of hours of powerpoint presentations with clip-art and was rudely awakened just before giving the speech. Half expected the experienced members in the board-room to burst out laughing.

Instead

*Shocked silence follows and slowly people start murmuring in approval* *Someone jots down a couple of points*

And once you get this MBA degree, you can make a rather comfortable living out of spouting such stuff day in and day out.. Why am i doing my MS again??

Self-Help Books:

If I ever wrote a self-help book, it would tell people to stop being grow a pair and do something about their lives instead of shelling out good money to read about someone stating the bloody obvious. And did I mention how fucking misleading they are:

” You can be what really you want to be.” screams the cover page in one of these monstrosities.

When I was 13, I wanted to be invisible so I could sneak into the ladies changing rooms. And I really wanted it! Did it happen? Did it fuck?

And to think people make millions compiling random anecdotes which plainly illustrate fuck-all and telling people they have the potential to succeed if they work hard and believe in themselves! Now that is what Project Fridays would call a scam

Optimists :

I agree I have a negative outlook on life and most people would readily describe me as cynical. I would go out on a limb and say its a better outlook towards life than spouting shite like :

” You got dumped by your girlfriend, your dog got run over by a car, you were fired from your job, your house burned down and you got anally raped by a biker gang while you were passed out drunk in a dark alley. So What? Cheer up, everything happens for one’s own good. The future is bright, amazing things will soon start happening! “.

As Dr.Cox says ” Lady, people aren’t chocolates. D’you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling. But I don’t find them half as annoying as I find naive bobble-headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine.”

Dr Cox knows best. Dr. Cox legend. Dr. Cox next best thing since sliced bread

Girls :

Subtle hints dont work

Obvious hints dont work

Just say what is on your mind in plain and simple English! Its not that difficult for fuck’s sake

Bunch of over-analyzing, mind games-playing, chocolate hogging, emotional blackmailing, psychotic freaks!

Arsenal fanboys :

But.. but… but we play beautiful football.. we play a team of young, innocent boys which is every geriatric peadophile’s wet dream.. we are always mercilessly hunted down by anti-footballing teams.. boo hoo sob sob, everyone hates us

Barcelona.. you bunch of cunts.. how dare you tap up your player whom we stole from you when he was 15 as he could not sign a contract according to the rules.. its against the law.. we represent what’s pure and holy in modern football. We are Arse- nawl football club

Go do one you sanctimonious pricks!!

Liverpool Football Club :

Roy Hodgson seriously? Just for one good run in the Europa League with Fulham? Why??

I know being disappointed at times is part and parcel of  following a football club but this is just taking the piss! When will something associated with the club ever cause me to smile! Aaargghh!!

14 years of my life in mostly complete anguish with a couple of bright spots in between. And it will remain that way as long as I keep on following football! Damn!!!

Thats it for now! More to follow when I get angry over other issues ( only a matter of time!).

Hardly working : Part 2

I thought i had the perfect plan to bring this blog to an untimely end. Write atrociously bad posts, remain inactive for months, stop commenting on other people’s blogs and generally lay low so that people would gradually forget that this blog existed. But alas, like every well thought out plan of mine, this too failed spectacularly. A crusade was started on facebook to get me to update this goddamn blog. I tried ignoring, the protests grew stronger and in the end i had no choice but to update.

Shift from college to work environment really takes time getting used to and not having things done according to your convenience can cause many a grad student to crib. But I decided I would not complain this time ( snigger ) but rather create a blog post with my experiences at work. So here goes, a real time ( ooohhhh geeky ) chronicle of my second day at work. Incidents from the first day will be updated later ( just to make the entire series appear cooler you see)

9:30 am : Walk into office. Receptionist recognizes me and gives me a bright smile. Struggle to comprehend what could possibly cause a human being to smile on a Monday morning. Walk to seat grumbling. Boss has asked me to spend the first couple of days reading about solar panels online. Does he not get that I am a grad student? If I spent an entire two days researching stuff, I would be as good as dead. Grumble to myself and login using friendly HR guy’s Id

9:45 am : Elderly uncle stands next to my seat trying to get my attention. ” I used to sit here before I retired, I want to check my mail. Can you please log off?” he says. Do not have heart to tell him e mail can be accessed from any of the seats. Get up and walk around office watching people drift in half asleep

10:00 Uncle now is questioning me about every aspect of my life. Girl next cabin walks in and promptly takes half the office along for breakfast. I am left behind while uncle checks pages and pages of unread mail.

10:15 : Uncle hands PC back to me. Some issue prevents me from logging in. Search for friendly HR guy who is nowhere to be seen. Walk around office looking totally lost ( an art which I have mastered)

10:30 : HR guy walks in and I have full access to PC now. Discover 1984 on google books. Think to myself ‘ today may not be all that bad after all ‘.

10:45 : Girl next cabin walks in and starts making plans for lunch

11:00 : Major commotion. According to eye-witness reports “mouse like creature” seen in ladies loo. Lots of screaming from the survivors. Half the office jolted from their sleep. Extermination task force created with the peons and over-enthusiastic guy from opposite cabin in charge. I half expect a board meeting with a powerpoint presentation with lots of clip-art depicting plan of action. In the end majority vote for the rather unimaginative but time tested method of beating the poor fucker to death with a stick.

11:35 : Peon walks into the loo with said stick. The entire office waits with bated breath. Women in office have now started gossping while men are discussing the world cup. I do not join in the conversation. Any group of individuals that has reached the general conclusion that C.Ronaldo is a class player does not deserve my attention.

11:40 : Peon walks out frustrated. Mouse nowhere to be seen. Normal service resumes. Girls decide to frighten the mouse in groups than alone. Secretly glad mouse lives to see another day. There may be more excitement yet.

11:45: Finally progress being made in getting me my own login and email id. I am asked for the serial number of my computer and father’s name. I struggle to find a correlation between the two.

12:15 : Stand up, clear throat and walk purposefully all around office with no particular aim. Attempt to get some attention fails spectacularly. I might be invisible for all you know. Toy around for a minute with things to do if I am indeed invisible. * Thoughts censored *

12:30 : Version of 1984 on google books just a preview. Pages missing. Shit

12:45 : Girl next cabin leaves for lunch

1:30 : Still no sign of promised meeting with mentor. Finally decide to go for lunch. Find every eatery within miles of office as packed as a Texas bound bus in Mexico. Satisfy myself with a Diary Milk.

1:45 : Think about accessing sickipedia at work. On second thoughts, decide its not the brightest idea. Watch girl next cabin flirt with over enthu guy to get him do her work. Sympathize with over enthu guy. No way he is going to be able to say no.

2:30 : IT guy turns up to give me my own login and mail id’s. He begins by asking me for my username. Seems confused when I tell him I have not got one yet and he has been called to create one for me. Frantic consultations on phone ensue. Over enthu guy has agreed to do girl next cabin’s work for her. She is now showing photos on facebook to entire office.

3:00: IT guy in the face of great odds has created a login for me. He seems pleased with himself. I feel happy for him.

3:30 : After 16 hours at work realize facebook is not blocked by work filter. Feel somewhat stupid for not discovering it earlier.

4:00 : Still no sign of proposed meeting with mentor. Wonder why PORTFA is quite inactive these days. Spend the next hour randomly browsing the BBC website. Meet person in office who has done his masters from Ohio State. He says it takes a couple of days to be assigned serious work. Spend a few minutes with him bitching about the US economy. Realise I am known in office as ‘the Texan’. Coolest nickname ever!!

5:00 : Plate of vada sambhar materializes when I go to sign a few forms. Pleased with this. As a grad student free food is not just a welcome distraction, its a way of life.

6:00 : Vodafone call up saying they do not have my documents and will terminate my connection if it pleases them. Not surprised as I have only submitted them twice before and been a customer for 5 years. Pleased that there is someone to heartily abuse at the end of a long day at work! (sic)

6:30 : Seems meeting wont take place today. After great deliberation finally leave office and bump into mentor who hasnt been there all day. He says if I werent leaving for home we could have had the long-awaited meeting. I hastily agree to stay back . He tells me not to trouble myself and says we will meet sometime tomorrow. Leave office feeling utterly stupid. Tomorrow might be better, I tell myself.

( Part 1 will be online in 24 hours. ( or not). Not like its a matter of grave concern anyway)

Whats cooking??

Tears streamed down my face, my eyes were red and puffy. The world around me was hazy, everything seen through the globule of salty water that had accumalated in the gap between my eyelids. I looked down and the onion i was cutting, muttering curses under my breath! Ohh wait i seemed to have jumped the gun a bit, lets go back to where it all started.

You people might remember the article i wrote about women drivers ( you dont? meh, i had my hopes up for a minute there!) . Anyway moving on, this invited a lot of ( not wholly undeserved) criticism from a lot of female readers. In fact there were even some who told me you should try cooking once and see. Well i have and to be fair i am a guy who loves laughing at himself as much as he loves laughing at others. So here is a summary of my experience.

Okay one thing a beginner in the kitchen needs is a cook-book.It basically gives you a step by step procedure to make a dish which when finished produces something so totally unlike the pictures given in the book and probably never tastes like the author intended it to. But for the novice, its still something to refer to create something that at the very worst will not result in loss of life. To cut a long story short i got myself a book titled ” My first cook book” and entered the kitchen.

This is where reality began to sink in. While a recipe looks small in a book, getting it done in real life is no easy task. For eg, the writer takes into account that you will have bowls and bowls of cut vegetables at your disposal to be put in use wherever required. This not being the case, i cut the required vegetables by hand spending a lot of time and energy . When i was finished, sweaty and bothered with tomato pulp running down my hand, my dear mother explained to me how to use a food processor to finish the above work in seconds! ( Stop laughing!).

Decided to make a chicken curry which seemed to be quite simple. Problems plauged the endeavour from the very start.  The recipe was for one chicken. Having no idea whether the cut pieces in the fridge belonged to one chicken, i stood scratching my head. Finally decided to count the number of legs to determine and found out that three of them were present. Considering the cookbook had no solutions to such a quandary, i decided to go ahead considering the presence of an extra limb as an unavoidable genetic mutation.

However managed to get it all done at the end of 45 minutes and the net result was something not altogether unappetizing but could have done with less salt. Probably should not have cried so much while cutting those bloody onions.

Anyway this promises to be just the first of many misadventures in the kitchen as learning to cook has now become an unavoidable necessity. Hoping to keep you posted as i stumble, fumble and bumble my way around the kitchen , complicating the simplest preparation and giving my dear mother a few more grey hairs!

A new start

From you special correspondent

( random red top british tabloid)

” We all know restarting a blog after an interval of a few months is always a daunting task. It is difficult to know if the blogger’s readers are still interested in whatever latest waste of cyberspace that is his new blog post , whether his blog been removed from a few blogrolls ( why would i keep this link? the whole thing is dead and buried now!) and whether people will actually remember that he was once  active ( relatively) on the blogging scene”. So said someone and no one took notice. In fact this quote has only been quoted to increase the size of this article and get a good payment.

This particular  blog has been dead for the last few months but there is talk about a return to blogging action. A lot of things had kept the blogger busy in the past  but the present  lack of activity in the blogger’s life coupled with a sudden revival of interest in literature after reading ” The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy” may prompt a few updates in the upcoming days. While nothing can officialy be  confirmed, sources close to the blogger say that he has run out of patience swatting flies and may actually get off his lazy arse and put in a few posts in a similar vien to the ones in the past.

A dedicated reader ( trust me we had to search high and low for this unique specimen) when interviewed said that she could hardly wait for the new wave of posts while absent- mindedly flipping through pages of a magazine and barely stifling a yawn. We could find no one else remotely interested in talking to us and hence spent the whole day betting how long Mickey Owen would stay uninjured and discussing if his hamstrings had a half-life less than radio-active plutonium.

Your reporter then proceeded to curse her luck for having to cover such a non-story and hoped that the next story she could cover would be fractionally more interesting which in retrospect actually sounded quite feasible considering the present story had been as interesting as watching grass grow.

A letter!

One fine day while checking my inbox to see what the US universities have been upto I glanced upon the following mail.

Hey,

We are planning to create a collection of all our experiences ofEngineering and compile it onto a DVD. For that, we require each ofyou to write a paragraph on how the past 4 (or 3) years have been foryou. Limit it to about 250-300 words. This will feature with yourphoto that we will take on farewell day – so dress well and come.Also, if you have any pictures of our classmates and you’ve notalready given it to Malpe, please do it as soon as possible. Butbefore that, delete any repeats that you have.If you have any doubts, ask me on Monday and get this thing done bythe coming Wednesday.

Heston

Now my experience in this college would be hard to summarise in 3000 words rather than 300. After a lot of time spent deliberating came up with this one. For me the criterion for the letter was simple : it had to be cliched and nostalgic and reflect the sentiments of the rest of the class.

To all the wonderful people who make up the class of BE Electrical,

Four years ago I walked into the F.E Electrical classroom with apprehension not knowing what to expect. Even to this day I feel the same way while entering class, there is no way of knowing what the crazy bunch of people whom I call my classmates have been up to and most of the time it is nothing wholesome!

They same time flies by when you are having a good time and the last four years in SPCE bear testament to this fact. It feels only like yesterday when we were eager eyed F.E’s shying away from our seniors and today the rest of the college looks upto us.

As a class we have laughed at the smallest things, fought for the silliest reasons  ( almost always involving kushal) ,taken tension about submissions together and sometimes even studied a bit. Inspite of not being the best of athletes we have played every single sport under the sun ( literally) and probably inspired our insipid juniors to do the same. Almost everything new in college can be traced back to our class whether it be blood donation, clothes donation drive or more recently Sardar Patel Quiz Club. Inspite of never doing well in rink football or winning the dance in Techno Break   ( something we had planned to do in first year), we have left our indelible mark on this college and long may our legacy thrive.

Every day has been a learning experience and I am not talking about lectures here. The multitude of shared interests has really helped make the last four years exciting and memorable. I doubt i will ever be able to reach the same level of familiarity with my classmates which i have become accustomed to in this wonderful class.

Its been a pleasure being able to share space and be a part of your lives and its something I shall always thank God for.What I have experienced in this class is a priceless treasure which I shall keep close to my heart till my dying breath.

I wish everyone the very best for their future and I am sure it will be a bright and successful one. Perhaps we shall meet one day after a few years to refresh our memories and laugh about all the wacky things we had done in these four years in college. Till then let this be my contribution to the class effort of keeping these memories alive long after we have passed out from the doors of our esteemed institution.

Yours Sincerely

Deepak Mohan

A Photoshoot

The sun shone mercilessly down on the amphitheatre. The stone seats were boiling hot. There was no breeze from over the lake. All in all an unwelcome place. The few living things in the area had retired to the sparse shades of the trees which stood on both sides of the gravel path.

They converged to the spot. 60 of them dressed in white and blue. As expected there was no unity in the time of arrival. Some were early while some had to be threatened with dire consequences if they failed to grace the occassion. True to form there was a lot of shouting, laughing and teasing. The din could be heard in college but being a regular occurence was ignored. The authorites had given up on ever bringing order to this chaotic group. BE Electrical had developed quite a reputation for unruliness in the college and this photoshoot was going to be no exception.

The two designated expert photographers (sic) waited patiently. There was a lot of confusion as the class tried to arrange themselves. Three perfectionists assisted the photographers in making a jumbled mess of the seating arrangement. There was a lot of shifting and moving as people tried to make sense of the gesticulations and instructions . The class waited baking in the summer heat. There was no grumbling; the atmosphere about as cheerful as a meeting of a suicide helpline. Sweated flowed profusely along with the choiciest abuses as the class tried to get along with the photoshoot.Finally the perfectionists relented and ran upto the top of the formation conveniently missing out on vacant spots in the lower rows.

Everyone wanted a copy of the picture and for some reason the technology of photo transfers using pendrives had slipped their minds. Four to five different cameras were used to take the same picture and for safety sake two pictures were taken from each camera. With so many back up options things couldnt go wrong but unfortunately they did. The photos were not much appreciated and there was talk of another photo session at 4pm. The proposal was vociferiously shot down considering the heat which had left the survivors looking like participants in a wet t-shirt competition. They moved  rapidly to cooler confines. Who cared if the photos were unsymmetrical or people were looking away or holding green water bottles. After all we have never been perfect role models and it is only justified that the photo reflected the same.

The photoshoot had made everyone nostalgic. A reminder of time in college ticking away and the end of a glorious chapter in our lives. From now on everyone would be going their separate ways, some abroad for further education and some to work ( finally after 4 jobless years!). It had been a wonderful experience and time spent in this college would be sorely missed.There was a reasonfor this sudden nostalgia . A change from the familiar to the unknown is always accompanied by a certain apprehension. The mind trying to find refuge in past memories instead of contemplating on what the future might hold. There was a general uneasiness and the news of the impending farewell on 9th April did nothing to improve the mood.

An hour later we were back to normal. The last few days of college were not meant to spend in contemplation and sulking. It was up to us to have as much fun as possible in the limited time available to us, to create a legacy that would not be easily forgotten and in general soak in as much as of the unique atmosphere at SPCE which cannot be experienced anywhere else in the world. And boy are we going to put this plan into action!!

Loss and Repentance

He was six. The age where every day brought a new adventure and every night he went to sleep with a clear conscience. He was staying at his grandmother’s house , a village 50 kilometers from the nearest city. He spent his days exploring the surrounding countryside with his best friend Bruno. Bruno was 10 years old, black and with soft silky fur, a mongrel but one of the friendliest, smartest dogs around,

That fateful day he woke up quite early in the morning. Today he wanted to walk to the stream which lay some distance to the south and spend the day in the water with Bruno. To his surprise all his family surrounded the kennel, their faces somber. Bruno lay motionless, his tongue lolling out staring at the congregation with sightless eyes. Why was Bruno not moving? Why did he not bound towards him, his tail wagging, the air resounding with his joyous barks while attempting to lick every uncovered part of his master’s body? His mind raced. He was too young to understand death. He wanted to run towards Bruno and shake him awake. He was held back by his mother. Her eyes welled with tears as she tried to explain to him as best as she could the circle of life ending with inevitable death. He listened, his legs seem to give way. His blissful world had come down crashing around him. He sat down on the cold hard earth feeling helpless.

He watched as the labourers dug the earth near the outhouse, moving mechanically, their emotions not clouded by the tragedy which had just occurred. It took them very little time to dig a small grave and they callously tossed Bruno’s body inside and covered it with red mud. He ran inside and got some flowers from the prayer room and laid them on the grave as respectfully as he could. He sat by the grave absent-mindedly chewing a blade of grass determined to gave his faithful friend and companion company till his mother came to fetch him.

A few hours later, he was sitting on the low wall which surrounded his house. He wanted to get away from it all. He felt his pockets and found a small picture of God which his parents had given him. “ If you pray hard enough you will get what you want son”, his mother’s words rang in his ears. Holding the picture close to his chest he prayed for the return of his dog. He turned back in expectation but God had failed him this time. Bruno was still sleeping in his earthy tomb oblivious to his master’s prayers. Disgusted he flung the photo into a nearby bush. His parents were obviously wrong, God did not exist and nor was he as merciful as they led him to believe. Like millions before him, he felt God had deserted him when he needed him most. He resolved to never pray again and buried his face in his hands and cried.

That night he tried to sleep but something disturbed him. He remembered his mother saying that God rewarded good children. Maybe he had been bad and Bruno was taken away from him as a punishment. If he prayed hard and behaved himself, God would be happy and he would be reunited with his dog. He had to find that picture first thing in the morning and plead for forgiveness. He turned around, hugged his grandfather and went to sleep. That night in his dreams, he played with Bruno ;  their friendship transgressing lives and domains.

Her first driving lesson

Before going any further let me state very clearly that I have only the highest regard for women drivers. The last thing I want is a bunch of crazy, angry women armed to the teeth hunting me down for resorting to stereotypes.

She had heard many times that women made terrible drivers. Her blood boiled at this abominable attempt by the male gender to slander her sex. Being a woman she was well aware that she was naturally gifted and could excel at whatever she wanted. She had been waiting impatiently for months to turn 18 so that she could have her first taste of driving as promised by her parents. She wanted to prove to the male population that they were just a bunch of arrogant , stuck-up flea-bags who resorted to stereotyping women to cover their own inadequacies.

I was sitting by the ramp late in the evening. I had forgotten the house keys and had been waiting for mother to return from her latest shopping mission when she walked by with her driver. Her face stern, eyes glinting with determination she almost walked by without noticing me. ( How I wish things would have stayed that way! ). Suddenly she became aware of my presence. ” I remember you saying that the easiest way to reduce our rapidly expanding population was to allow only women drivers on the road! “, she said, her face failing to conceal her obvious rage and contempt. I shrank back. I had never said anything like that but she seemed to be in a no mood for a civilized debate. ” Now you are going to sit in the backseat and change your opinion once and for all! “. I tried to make a million objections but for once God had decided to take back the power of speech which distinguished me from the rest of the animal kingdom. To cut a long story short I found myself in the back seat of the car.I looked at her driver; his face resembled that of a condemned man contemplating the gallows.

The first five minutes passed by smoothly. While lesser humans take ages , she had deciphered the intricate mechanisms of fastening her seatbelt in this interval. Now her driver explained to her the working of the accelarator, brake, clutch and gearbox. She drank in all this knowledge knowing that each small step brought her closer to her ultimate goal. But being a woman she could not help being impatient and all she wanted to do now was to start the stupid car and drive it around the colony basking in the glory of her latest triumph.

The driver told her to change to first gear. She yanked the gearbox with terrific strength, derived from her supressed rage at having been denied all her life upto this very moment. The driver looked at me. I could read his thoughts, if she carried on like this, the gear would be soon flying out of the windshield. He tried to sweettalk her into stopping for the day, his mind obviously drifting to his family waiting for him back home. She did not budge.

Now he asked her to gently release the clutch. She was very gentle, the car only rocked like a prize horse at a rodeo causing me and the driver to bang our heads on the ceiling. We were still stunned when she decided to give the accelarator a shot. A brick wall stood 50 metres away and we were heading for it like a moth towards a flame.  ” Press the brake”, we shouted in unision. ” Which is the brake?”, she screamed the terror evident in her voice. Her bright idea had not gone as per plan. ” The one in the middle, press it, press it for Gods sake! You are going to kill us”, we sobbed. She pressed down hard. Her driver had forgotten to wear his seatbelt. He flew forward banging his head against the windshield, a nasty bump forming on his forehead . For my part I had hit my nose on the seat ahead, tears were streaming down my face.

She was shaken for some time but immediately regained her composure. ” It was just a minor blip, I will be learning in no time”. She walked out her head held high. We heaved a sigh of relief. God did not want us to be crash-test dummies on that particular day. I walked out wondering what every man has pondered in his lifetime. ” Why must they always act out the stereotype in their attempts to disprove it!”

Hello world!

I am on wordpress now!!

Just an update

When i first started this blog; I was very enthusiastic churning out posts at an amazing frequency. Since then the motivation to create new posts has somewhat diminished and to my surprise there have been no new posts for almost 2 weeks. There is probably a reason for this inexcusable lethargy. The last few weeks have seen a flurry of action in my life which has left me with very little time to update the blog
So here is just a brief summary of events in the last two weeks

SPACE : SPACE 09 promised to be bigger and better than ever before. (snigger). While the day-time events were better than last year the pronites really took boredom to a whole new level. Winning the last quiz of my last SPACE would probably be the most memorable moment of the whole festival. The one phenomenon that puzzles me is the lack of enthusiasm from the majority of people towards the festival. While a fraction of my class worked our asses off trying to spice up the festival, the rest were busy playing cricket in Bhavan’s ground ( Incredible but true!). This years SPACE also saw the introduction of compulsory seating in the quad during a pronite in a scene remniscent of a school festival. Considering the organised chaos in the quad that was a hallmark of all festivals till date; continuing this tradition will result in the ultimate death of the pronite. ( which judging by the present standards may not be such a bad thing after all!)

Results : Being in final year has a distinct advantage. The days when the rumour of an impending display of the result which would stir the class like a hornet’s nest have long gone. There is no pandemonium at the mere utterance of the word, rather a weary walk to the exam centre contemplating the same journey made in previous years. It was afternoon on the first day of SPACE when the results finally came out interrupting our ( rahter expensive) lunch at the food court. This year the gods had been merciful to us. Almost everyone in my group passed and I got a 78% ( which is quite surprising considering the amount of time I spent in GRE and admissions last semester). Anyhow alls well that ends well and thats one monkey off my back for now

The Admits : At last, at long last, two admits have arrived. One from the University of Texas at Arlington and the other from Austin. I apologise to all my friends for being excessively depressed during the dark days prior to this when nothing seemed to be working inspite of their assurances that everything would work out in the end. I am now finally in a position to give that damn seminar on GRE and the admission procedure with a clear conscience. My heart goes out to all those who will be forced by the IEEE committee to sit for it against their better judgement.

SPQC : SPQC is the only thing worth looking forward to every week although my active participation is being resented by a lot of people for winning all the previous quizzes. ( Seems everyone else also wants the honour of showing Chinmay the finger after winning!). So this time I have been requested to set the quiz along with Heston . Its my first time and setting a quiz is turning out to be fucking hard. I just hope I manage to set a half decent quiz and not end up killing SPQC once and for all.

Lectures. The lack of interest in football from my esteemed classmates has seen me sitting for far too many lectures than recommended by doctors to maintain mental health. For the first time in eight semester the defaulter’s list does not have the honour of including my name. A sad reminder of how incredibly boring this semester has been.

Anyway thats it for now. Signing off hoping for more frequent updates ( Yes, I can hear the multitude praying for the exact opposite but turn a deaf ear to their protests!!)